Does it hurt? Is it risky? How do you do it? Whether it's your first time or you want to explore new sensations, we invite you to discover the subtle delights of anal exploration. Come, we'll tell you everything.
Maybe you’re looking to explore new sensations or spice up your sex life. Or maybe penis-in-vagina sex isn’t for you. Or maybe you’ve heard about the pleasures of the practice and want to learn more, even if you’re not sure whether or not to try it. Whatever your reasons, we’re demystifying everything about anal sex for you.
Who is anal sex for?
Good news: Anal sex is for everyone. No, it’s not just for gay men—many prefer other practices like mutual masturbation . Anal pleasure isn’t tied to your sexual orientation or gender. No matter what your genitals are, anal can feel great.
If you have a prostate
Have you ever heard of the P-spot? That's what the prostate is called, a nod to the famous G-spot. When it's properly stimulated, it can give you incredible orgasms. And multiple ones. Yes, you read that right. Located about 5 cm inside the anus, this ultra-erogenous zone can be reached with a finger or a toy, for solo or couple pleasure.
If you don't have a prostate
No prostate? No worries. You can still enjoy anal sex, because the anus is full of nerve endings that love to be stimulated. The anus, being very narrow and tight, offers a feeling of fullness that can be incredibly pleasurable.
If you have a clitoris
Did you know that the visible part of the clitoris is only the tip of the iceberg and that its internal roots measure on average 13 cm? What connection does this have, you ask? All orgasms of people with a clitoris come from direct or indirect stimulation of this organ, and it is possible to excite these roots anally, until reaching orgasm!
Are there any risks to anal sex?
Any sexual practice carries risks of contracting sexually transmitted infections. Fellatio, cunnilingus, penetration: no one escapes them. It's the other side of the coin of pleasure and orgasms. But the risk is a little higher for anal sex, because the walls of the anus are delicate and porous. That said, as long as you remember to protect yourself by using a condom, getting tested and being on PrEP, it's completely safe. We also advise you to go gently at first to avoid lesions and minimize risks.
Is it dirty?
Let's be honest: you might encounter a little fecal matter. That's normal, that's where it goes!
To avoid unpleasant surprises, we recommend that you visit the toilet before indulging in anal pleasure, and preferably, avoid attempting the experience on a full stomach.
For even more comfort, you can opt for an anal douche and do an enema. The main thing is to be comfortable with your partner and not to make a big deal out of it if there is a little mess. After all, it's completely natural.
Does it hurt?
No, not when it's done well. You have to go gently, work on the elasticity and especially use a lot of lubricant . If it hurts, it's a sign that you're doing something wrong, that you're not relaxed enough or that you're going too fast. But we'll talk about preparing the anus a little later, I promise.
How to approach the subject with your partner?
There’s no point in “picking the wrong hole” here. To try anal sex, you need your partner’s enthusiastic consent . If talking about your sexual preferences doesn’t come easily to you, you can always broach the subject by sharing this article with them. It’s a sweet and naughty way to see if they’re interested in the idea, while also answering their questions. A sentence like: “I read this article today, I found it interesting. What do you think?” can be a great icebreaker.
If the person is up for it, great! Now you can take action. If not, don't insist. You can always explore your own intimacy on your own. It's even recommended before letting someone else venture there. That way, you know better what feels good to you and you can guide the other person, or have fun alone. Even if you prefer to penetrate rather than be the person penetrated, having an idea of the feeling can help you bring the other person to seventh heaven. In short, you have nothing to lose!
How to do it
Broaching the subject with your significant other is done. Getting their consent is done. Going to the bathroom and freshening up is done too. Then what do we do?
Relax
Penetrating the anus is easier when the body is warmed up and relaxed. It is also much more pleasant to focus on the sensations rather than on the fears. Relax, take your time and listen to your body.
Take it easy
Forget the porn videos: to enjoy anal penetration, you have to take it slowly, especially if it's your first time. The anus is tight, but elasticity can be worked on. Start with some foreplay. You can first caress the anus, then insert a finger or a small anal plug . By making light rotating movements, you will relax the muscles of the rectum, which will then allow you to insert something bigger, if you want.
Small note: it is not necessary to go deep to feel maximum pleasure. Remember that the prostate is only 5 cm deep. Surface penetration is enough to stimulate it and to excite the many nerve endings located at the beginning of the anus.
Use a lot of lubricant
Don't skimp on the lube. Unlike the vagina, the anus doesn't naturally lubricate itself. So it's essential to use it generously to avoid any unpleasant friction. If you plan on using a toy or condom, choose a water-based lubricant (not silicone). And don't hesitate to add more along the way for endless pleasure.
Communicate with each other
As with any sexual practice, good communication with your partner is essential. If you are penetrating, ask the other person if they like what you are doing. If you are the one being penetrated, guide the other person to indicate your preferences. It is not complicated and can even become dirty talk , increasing the level of arousal.
Anal sex besides penetration
Anal sex is not limited to penetration. If you want to explore this erogenous zone deeper — there are plenty of options. You can try rimming, which is particularly enjoyable, or, if you are already comfortable, you can even try fisting . Solo, with a partner or in a group. With a penis, a toy or your fingers. It's up to you to choose what you like. And if you prefer not to try, that's totally okay too. Either way, there are so many options when it comes to sex!